Currently Reading The Social Fabric, Volume II (9th Edition) By Thomas L. Hartshorne, Robert A. Wheeler, John H. Cary, Julius Weinberg see related

   I have really slacked off in my Xanga posting since returning to San Antonio.  I think it's because I actually have other, more interesting things to do now.  It's not like anyone ever reads my Xanga anyway.  Except you, Kyle.  Oh, and Trisha, but she already knows everything I do anyway.  I don't write for others though, I write for myself.  I write for the sheer enjoyment that it brings me, and to better my writing and find my "voice."

   So what have I been up to?  I'm taking two classes right now.  A Spanish class from 9-12 Monday through Thursday at UNAM San Antonio, and a Post Civil War U. S. History class at SAC from 6 to 9 p.m. Mondays and Wednesdays.  I'm enjoying my Spanish class a lot.  I think I'm getting much better at speaking Spanish (though still not where I'd like to be), and I enjoy the people in my class.  I am one of three students, so it's quite intimate.  The class is in Hemisphere Park, downtown, so I'm getting to see a side of San Antonio I haven't known before.

   My history class is...interesting.  My professor is opinionated and explosive, but I'm actually very glad I'm taking the class from him.  He really likes teaching history.  I generally come away from classes having learned one overall theme.  In this class, I am realizing how privileged and snobby I really am.  I stay in my own safe bubble, and am offended when someone tries to convince me that there is poverty or suffering in the world.  This has been a theme that God has been impressing on me for a while, but it has come to a head this summer.  Jesus didn't just hang out with the rich and the church-going, he spent most of his time with the poor and oppressed and the sinners.  I want to emulate Him.  So I'm reevaluating my career path.  And in the meantime, I've decided to volunteer with the Battered Women's Shelter.  I have an interview Thursday- I'm excited!  It's more than just doing one thing though, God has to change my heart from the selfish thing that I am.  I have to let Him make me more like Him, so I can recognize the needs around me.

Currently Watching The Maltese Falcon By Humphrey Bogart, Mary Astor see related

   Well, I promised a picture of my costume for the Cheese of the Month Society.  I can't figure out how to post it in my weblog entry, so I had to make it my profile pick.

   Sure enough, no one else dressed in any sort of costume Saturday night.  That was okay though.  I enjoyed myself immensely.  I don't know when I've had that much fun.  We made up silly rules that made our society seem official.  We all voted on silly titles for ourselves, such as the Prime Muenster and Darth Cheddar.  I'm definately bringing a branch of the Society up to OU in the fall.

   I've realized I like to indulge in a fantasy world entirely too much.  One of the characters in this great movie from the 1940s that I watched today said that there are two kinds of people in the world; those who write in their diaries about the lives they wish they had, and those who are too busy living those lives to keep a diary about it.  (It was a really cute movie, by the way: The More the Merrier, 1941)  I am one of the former types.  Only I'm not even a very faithful diary writer/blogger.  I merely sit around and daydream.  Or lie awake at night and think up fabulous scenarios for my life and the lives of other people around me.  This is not the life which I was meant to live.  God has something greater out there for me than watching old movies and wishing I could find the Maltese Falcon.

   I watched The Maltese Falcon tonight (the old classic with my hero, Humphrey Bogart).  The whole movie long, all the criminals lied and murdered in their quest for this one object, the Maltese Falcon, which they believed had immeasurable value.  In the end, they found out the statue they'd been fighting to get for the past 17-odd years was really a fake.  After the criminals were all arrested, Detective Sam Spade made a very perceptive comment about the fake Maltese Falcon.

"What is it, Sam?"

"Oh, just the stuff dreams are made of," Sam replied.

   I don't want to find out later on that the things I've been pinning my hopes on aren't real; lead birds in place of the jewel-encrusted treasure I thought they were.  There are only three things of eternal value in this world: God, His word, and the souls of men.  Shouldn't I be investing my time and thoughts and energies into those things?  When it all comes down to it, I'm just a silly little girl with silly little ideas.  God is so much bigger than me.

   So I've decided to limit my intake of old movies, especially chick-flicks.  *sigh*  Even though I like them, they really aren't good for me.  They only make me compare my life to the exciting world of the movies where everything turned out sunny-side-up. 

Currently Reading The Twilight of Courage: A Novel By Bodie Thoene, Brock Thoene see related

   Tonight we're having the first summer meeting of the Cheese of the Month Society.  I was invited to join by David Brower, one of my fabulous high school drama friends.  He is this month's "Big Cheese," which means he gets both the cool title and the priviledge of hosting the meeting/party and choosing the cheese for this month.  The cheese is Brie and the theme is French.

   I really love theme parties.  I haven't been to one in forever.  I asked Dave if I could come dressed in French clothes and he said, "Sure!"  He should not have acquiesed.  I jump at any chance to dress up in a costume.  Originally I was just going to wear a beret, but one thing led to another and I am now wearing a vintage 40's floral-print dress, tan heels, vintage purple gloves, vintage lavender flower hat, and my mom is going to do my hair in a French Twist.  I'm going for that whole, Paris, pre-WWII look.  No one else is going to be dressed up, I know.  However, I really like the outfit, and I rarely get to dress up, so I'm going to wear it.  I'm excited.

   I've been practicing my French accent, and it's pretty pathetic.  I knew I needed help, so watched Gigi the other night so I could listen to French accents and try to mimic them.  Somehow my voice just never sounds like them.  I just end up sounding drunk.  So I think I'm going to stick with the few French phrases that I know, such as "Bonjour, ma cherie!" and "Cest la vie!"  I'll make sure to take pictures and post them.  Watch for them in the next day or two! 

Currently Watching Star Wars - Episode IV, A New Hope (Special Edition) By Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher see related

   I am a nerd.  I tried to fool myself into thinking I was just enthusiastic, or becoming a connoisseur of many different things.  No.  Lord of the Rings, Jane Austen, Les Miserables, Xanga, Phantom of the Opera, Star Wars, Cary Grant, My One and Only, Riverdance- all these obsessions point to only one conclusion: I am a nerd.  Check out the article that put me in my place so brilliantly (especially towards the end).  Are you a nerd too?

Currently Playing O By Damien Rice see related

   I just got back from watching Star Wars Episode III; Revenge of the Sith, with my parents.  Here's our reviews:

Dad- "A must-see movie!"

Mom- "It sure was long."

Me- "I liked it.  Where are we going to dinner?"

   That's the short version, of course.  We talked about the movie(s) the entire time we ate dinner at Chipotle, because two of the three people at the dinner table were my dad and I.  Let me explain: Dad and I both love to analyze movies.  If you've never watched a movie with me, you're missing out (or lucky).  I'm one of those annoying people who like to comment on the movie the whole way through, even when everyone else in the room has shown they are obviously not interested, or even when I'm alone.  I also tend to chew over movies for hours or days after I watch movies.  I was depressed for two days after I watched Romeo and Juliet (yes, the one with Leo).  I just kept thinking, Why did they both have to die?  They had such a beautiful love! 

   So we discussed the movie's themes over burritos, and Star Wars in general.  Although we did this rather confusedly since we couldn't seem to get the episodes straight in our head.  I still can't quite remember who Quigon (sp?) was.

   I've been watching a lot of movies lately, actually.  This was my first in the theater since I've been home, but I've watched a ton on TV.  My parents got satellite with DVR so I can record up to 100 hours of programming.  It's fabulous!  It's also a terrible temptation to just loll about and waste time.  I worked out a system where every couple of days I program the next few days of recordings, generally just from AMC and TCM channels. 

   It's so satisfying to watch old movies.  They're like meatloaf, or home-made rolls.  Most of them are rather clean.  They just have a slower pace that I like.  I also would rather watch an entire movie than a TV show.  I like the sense of conclusion that one receives from watching a whole movie.

   It does take a long time to watch these great movies though (and some of them not so great), and I've been trying to limit my movie watching.  I've realized I need to come up with an alternative activity for myself until my summer classes and internship start.  So I decided I'd read some fiction.  I was trying to read non-fiction, and I still will, but it just doesn't absorb me enough to attract me away from the TV.  So last night (after watching Pillow Talk, then Tammy and the Bachelor) I went through our library.  It's rather extensive.

   It is hard choosing a book to read.  There's a lot of pressure placed on a young lady to improve herself by reading "good" books.  It's difficult to determine just what will be a good book, however.  I want something interesting, yes.  But I still feel like I should be learning when I read.  If I'm going to put that much time and energy into something, I want to get some long-term benefits out of it.  I also feel there are some social constraints as to what is and is not a socially acceptable book for me.  We could argue whether this should be or not, but there are unwritten rules governing my book selection nonetheless.  I would not choose a book from the "juvenile" section of the library.  I also want to choose an appropriate book, which knocks all those bodice-ripping romances off the prospect list as well.

   Last night I picked up Choosing the Love of Your Life.  A little odd, considering I was looking for some fiction.  It was very interesting, and a fast read.  I'd reccamend it.  I finished it last night shortly before the Spurs won the series-winning game.  In the process of reading it, I wrote out a profile of my future husband.  The author recammended creating one now, so I did.  It's changed since my last list I made my Senior year of high school.  "Eyes so blue you could get lost in them" didn't make the list this time around.  I can definately see the virtue of waiting until you are older to get married.  I've only recently begun discovering who I am, and thus the kind of person I would make a good match for.

   *Bang*  We'll just shoot that rabbit and get back to the topic of books.

   Today I went to the library to continue my quest for an acceptable fiction book that would distract me from classic movies.  I have one word for the San Antonio Public Library System: fabulous!  The Ed Cody branch (that I go to), in particular, is quite breathtaking.  The sheer selection of books, movies (both VHS and DVDs), CDs, and books on CDs is amazing in both the quantity and the quality.  Just say a book, any book.  Yep, the SA library has it.  Go ahead, just try and see if you can search for a book they won't have.  Our branch has gotten a lot of Christian books and CDs in the last few years too.  My mom thinks a Christian is secretly infiltrating the ranks of the library staff and stocking the shelves.  (I agree.)  I used to think all libraries were as cool as ours.  Not so.  The Norman library is dinky and measly.  Their shelves aren't even completely full.  They're linked to a number of other small Oklahoma towns, but it takes forever to get the things ordered from those libraries.  It took over two months for me to get a book I ordered in Norman once.  The San Antonio library, on the other hand, has an excellent ordering system.  You can order a book (or whatever) online and pick it up at your library in a few days.  Have I told you how fabulous our library is?  Oh, another reason it's so fabulous: it stocks videos of all those great miniseries from A&E and the BBC.  I love those!  You know, like Horatio Hornblower and Pride and Prejudice.  I checked out four episodes of Poirot I've never seen before.  He's my favorite detective from Agatha Christie's stories.

   I didn't know what books I wanted to check out from the library.  I headed to the fiction section, and decided to start at the beginning and work my way through.  (I was actually at the end though.)  I worked from Z to U.  By that point I'd been at the library over an hour and already had picked up a stack of books, so decided to call it quits.  I'll work through the rest of the alphabet during the course of the summer.

   Here are the books I checked out: To the Lighthouse by Viginia Woolf, The Ponder Heart by Eudora Welty, Pray and Die by Stella Whitelaw, The In-Between World of Vikram Lall by M. G. Vassanji, Morality Play by Barry Unsworth, Losing Nelson by Barry Unsworth.  If any one has read any of these, I would love to hear your opinion of them.  I based my opinion of them on the back covers, inside flaps, breif exerpts, and (in some cases) cover art.  The only author I'd ever heard of was Woolf.

   I also checked out three CDs.  The soundtrack to South Pacific, Audio Adrenaline Underdog, and Damien Rice 0.  Now I wish Damien Rice had really come to OU for a concert on the South Oval.  Too bad the chalkings were a hoax.  Wow, this was a long post.